boring boring.

I know I’ve been so boring no one wants to visit my blog anymore.

haha but the fact is there isn’t really anything interesting lately unless you’re interested in some economics theory (ooh, or even reproductive health knowledge) then you can request heheheh.

i spent the whole of today slacking at home. wokeup near afternoon, lied on my sofa to read the reprod health notes. got very bored, watch tv. studied a bit. watch tv. watch tv. watch tv. surf net. surf net. now.

yeah it’s useless and boring like that.

ARGH. OUGHT TO SLAP MYSELF.

you know, i don’t understand how people think i study a lot. in fact, i think they spend more time mugging in the library than me. my usual routine the past few days is either to slack at home or reach the lib at 11am and leave at 6pm. not very hardworking if you ask me. people camp there the whole day and they still dare to say me.

maybe i’m just fast.

ha, i can be such a bitch.

i can’t help but feel HIGHHHH thinking of how it feels like after 4th dec! woohoo!

Protected: I CAN DO IT.

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I’m a nerd.

Today! I went to see Prof Luo.

I’m starting to see the beauty of Econs again, after forgetting how it felt like to know it well last sem!

It’s like touching it in every part, seeing it in every angle. Knowing the intuition behind all the algebra and math.

OMG. that feeling is divine. that feeling of appreciating and understanding how those great economists invented such theories and models.

ECONORGASMIC HAHAHAHAH.

I found back my love for econs and I wanna fall deeper in love with it!!

That said, studying is still a torturing struggle.

I just read the weighing machine and i wanna strangle myself.

:’(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

Cheyyy. Nash and Harsanyi only came to fame in 1994. That’s like only 15 years ago? what right do they have to make us study so hard for game theory.

for all you know, i may (in the midst of studying) find a huge mistake in their theories (!!!). then game theory will be scraped plus i’ll win the nobel prize!

yea carry on dreaming :)

MUGGA-MUGMUG/

I think i’m a psycho possessive stalker.

dear, you hear that? :)

sadly, there’s nothing exciting to look forward to in the next three weeks.

i must tell myself, THERE’S A TIME FOR EVERYTHING!

and NOW IS THE TIME TO STUDY AND MUG WITH ALL MY HEART, SOUL, MIND, BODY!!!!!!

sigh

I look again at the calendar and realised to my dismay that i only have four days left for each module.

micro and all the math i’ve yet to figure out.

env with the stupid readings i’ve to do and facts to memorise.

spent the entire day doing my ob reflection paper. but at least that and the env project are finally done.

will i be able to do it again?

given the time constraint, given the six modules this sem, given the crazy project demands, given myself.

i don’t know….

will you please take me in?

I promise I’ll be a valuable asset.

Like diamond, like gold.

:)

the sem is ending.

and i am so screwed. i am so stressed up.

i haven’t started. i barely have time.

long day ends with a longgg post

Just got home from school not too long ago. so tired. :( what a long day.

on an emo note, this IS WEEK 13 OF SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

omg, this sem def passed really fast!

i see people already studied their notes, already consulting the profs . and me? nothing. haven’t touched anything. still wrapping up projects. exams are what.. one and a half weeks away?

how?

:( sigh.

i really wanna do well but mno is so difficult to determine and the econs students are getting more and more competitive by the sem i swear! no one slacks anymore i’m so stressed up with seeing people consulting lecturers and asking and answering qns.

NO, I REFUSE TO BE THREATENED!!!!!!!

sometimes, you underperform and stress yourself unnecessarily. sometimes it’s really not necessary to compare with others cos everyone has different pace. as long as i plan my schedule the way it suits me and really do my best, good results shall come naturally.

AMEN.

had meeting just now to wrap up the report and presentation for tmr. i love mno presentations they are so fun haha and i like to act too. i find it so fun and exciting. i think i’ll be an emotional person at the end of mno classes tmr cos seriously they bring me so much fun i love them compared to boring econs modules which are all about math and formulas. there’s no creativity involved, no acting, no laughing, no team bonding, no gossiping, no bitching, no out-of-the-box possibilities. endless.

today i saw a group of students at the deck discussing the game theory lecture notes tgt and i suddenly felt stressed again.

In uni, friends come and go. especially academic friends. friends who were damn close through projects are gone every sem. year by year they graduate. friends who take the same module end up doing differently. the good ones want to be distinguished from the bad ones. the good ones flock together, some friends are forgotten, some friends are intimidated, some friends disappear. in uni, people are superficial and u never know who’s true or not. some make use of u by copying your assignments, taking your lecture notes to copy while they slack and disappear from lecture perpetually, make use of your bothered attitude and eat off you.

LET ME EMPHASIZE. I BELIEVE IN MUTUAL BENEFIT.

i believe in good and hardworking people coming together to exchange ideas. I love helping people and also getting help from there cos this way, we learn more and we reaffirm what we have learnt.

but i hate people who make use of others. esp those who bluntly ask for notes. those who selfishly want to gain but not willing to put in any effort.

I don’t have anyone specific in mind when saying this. I just see this kinda thing happen a lot and i believe NO ONE SHOULD BE NICE ENOUGH TO BE MADE USE OF.

AND I WILL NOT BE MADE USED OF.

so start being bothered for your own sake please.

omg, i so didn’t intend to blog this.

anyway, i’m still pretty upset with my mummy. i forgot all that church has taught me about forgiveness. how could i? adults still lie to kids and break their promises after all. when i become someone’s mummy, will i lie and break promises too? :( i hope not.

-

i love my bf a lot <333